


Of Pasts and Mirrors

by ShortHand



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Awesome Leia Organa, F/M, Jedi Rey, Kylo Ren Redemption, One-sided Kylo Ren/Rey, Post-Star Wars: Return of the Jedi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-22
Updated: 2018-02-22
Packaged: 2019-03-21 16:01:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,558
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13744398
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShortHand/pseuds/ShortHand
Summary: Kylo Ren flees the First Order and turns himself in to the rebellion. Rey, Finn, and Poe are skeptical of his motivations, but Leia wants to believe the best of him.





	1. The Unexpected Visitor

" _Rey? Rey! Are you there? Wake up! Rey!_ " Finn's voice sounded distant, crackling through the ancient comm link.

Rey blinked groggily, her vision obscured by a chunk of hair that was plastered across her eyes. She looked at the comm panel next to her. A bleary red ' **0300** ' gleamed back at her. She hit the panel, "Finn?" she asked, "What is it?"

" _You're never going to believe this_ ," the words tumbled out of Finn. " _You need to get down the hangar right now. Kylo Ren is here._ "

All at once, she was awake. "How long? How many troops are here?" she demanded.

" _No, no. It's...it's just him. You should get down to the hangar_ ," Finn said.

She was already half dressed, pulling her tunic over her head and belting her lightsaber, "I'll be right there."

She half ran down the long hallway towards the hanger bay, mind racing. How could he have found them? In the year and a half since the battle of Crait, the tattered remnants of the Resistance had had to relocate four times already. But here on Ghixia Delta, so far removed from the center of the galaxy, General Organa-Solo, Commander Dameron, and even Rey herself thought that they would finally get some respite, a chance to recuperate and begin rebuilding alliances, to begin amassing munitions and ships, to plan.

Rey skidded to a halt near the entrance of the mostly empty hangar bay and looked inside.

Ben, no Kylo, she reminded herself sternly, was in the center of the room, half a dozen blasters trained on him. He was on his knees in front of the General and Dameron, head bowed. She gasped, remembering the last time she'd seen him through their bond in the same position. She'd replayed the scene in her mind hundreds of times, half-convinced she'd seen a flicker of remorse on his face.

No, she reminded herself again. He'd had a choice in the throne room, both of them reeling from the death of Snoke and the destruction of the Praetorian guard. He'd had a choice to put a stop to the First Order, to save the Resistance, and he'd chosen dominion over companionship, power over what was right, dark over light. The memory still left a bitter taste in her mouth.

If he sensed her presence, he gave no sign of it, and she didn't move any further into the hangar.

"Why have you come here?" the General asked, her voice tight. The lines of her body and face were conflicted, torn between her desire to rush to her long-estranged son and her duty to the rebellion.

"What I want to know," said Dameron through gritted teeth, "is how the hell he found us."

The general silenced the hot-shot pilot with a look, "Kylo Ren," she said, squaring her shoulders and adopting a formal, steely tone, "why did you come here? Why did you seek out the last of the rebellion?"

Kylo Ren looked up at his mother, his face impassive. The long scar that ran down his face and to his chest was just as vivid as it had been the last time Rey saw him, "I've come to atone for my crimes," he said, his voice clear, unwavering. It sent a shiver up her spine.

"Your crimes?" Leia asked softly, swaying slightly.

Kylo Ren nodded, "I helped to betray the galaxy. I aided Snoke in his rise to power and the ascendency of the First Order. I have killed others, I have ordered the deaths of--"

Leia raised a hand, "That's enough. I'm sure that we can fully imagine the scope of your actions," she sighed. "We don't have the structure for a court. Until we figure out what to do with you, we'll have to lock you up in the storage bay."

Kylo Ren nodded mutely.

"We'll also need his weapon," Commander Dameron said, nodding at the lightsaber strapped to Kylo Ren's belt.

Kylo Ren unhooked the lightsaber, sending a ripple of unease through the room. His prowess with the weapon was legendary, the truth of which Rey had seen herself back on the Supremacy. He fought like a demon, wild and ferocious. However, he only offered the weapon, hilt-first, to Dameron, who snatched it away from him and held it gingerly, as though he expected it to bite.

Dameron nodded to a few of the fighters holding blasters, "Take him to the storage bay."

Blasters still raised, the fighters inched closer to Kylo Ren. One of them tilted his blaster tip up, gesturing to rise. He stood, his height and massive frame taking over the empty space. He walked out, blasters following him as he left.

As they exited out the other door, Rey took a slow, deep breath, trying to calm her mind. It had been over a year since she had seen Kylo Ren, but it felt like no time had passed at all.

*****

"You cannot seriously trust him!" Dameron was shouting as Rey entered the command room.

"Poe," Organa-Solo said, pinching the bridge of her nose, "if you're going to shout like that, you can bloody well leave."

"With all due respect, General, I can't believe that I'm hearing you say that we shouldn't just execute the greatest war criminal in the galaxy outright."

" _I_ can't believe," the General said, fixing Dameron with a steely glance, "that you would throw away this potential tactical asset. If Ben --"

"Kylo Ren," Dameron interrupted, drawing out each syllable for emphasis.

"Fine," Leia snapped. "If Kylo Ren really does feel remorse and wants to help the rebellion, he can provide us with valuable information on the First Order! He's far more useful to us alive than riddle with blaster fire."

"With all due respect, General," Poe said, his voice heated, "are you sure that your feelings aren't clouding your judgement?"

Leia fixed him with a knife-sharp stare, "My _feelings_ are the only thing that's kept me alive this long, Commander. They're called 'instincts.' And they're telling me that Ben's atonement is genuine, and that he has knowledge that may be useful to us."

"General," Finn interrupted, "if he's left the First Order, they've disavowed him. They'll be hunting him."

"If they track him here, they'll track him here whether he's alive or dead," Leia said.

"This is a mistake, General," Dameron shook his head.

"Your objections are noted. Now get out. Not you, Rey, you stay."

Poe and Finn filed out, faces stormy. Finn paused to give her a significant look as he left. _You're on our side, right?_ it asked. She kept her own face was neutral in response.

Once doors had slid shut, Leia gave her a long, searching look, "What do you think?" she asked.

"I don't know," she answered.

Leia sighed, sitting in a nearby chair. The command room on Ghaxia Delta was old and rusting, the equipment near ancient. The chair screeched under Leia, "In some ways, you know my son better than anyone. Do you think it's possible that he feels remorse? Did you have any idea he would come here?"

Rey shook her head, "I've kept the bond closed since Crait. I didn't want to risk him finding us." She gave a short, sharp laugh, "For all the good that did."

She'd felt him though, flitting at the edges of her mind, trying to get through to her. It had been an excellent incentive to deepen her meditation practice.

"And do you think his desire to atone is genuine?" Leia leaned forward, turning the conversation back to the issue she wanted to discuss.

Rey shook her head again, "I don't know. There was a moment, before Snoke's death, where I thought he could be turned back, but all he ever wanted was power. He is so deeply wounded that he cannot see beyond his own desire to protect himself, to insulate himself from others. I don't know what could have happened that would make him feel remorse for his actions now."

Leia steepled her fingers, "I want you to talk to him, Rey. My _feelings_ that Commander Dameron has such disdain for tell me that he'll respond better to you than anyone else."

Rey's spine stiffened, "I would rather not, General."

Leia sighed, "That's too bad, because it's an order. This could be the break that we've been waiting for."

Rey pursed her lips, "Very well, General."

The General gave Rey a long look, "You're dismissed."

*****

For three days, Rey assiduously avoided the storage bay. She went through her daily routine, helping to gather food from the surrounding area, training with her lightsaber, trying to cobble together ships and tech from the mishmash of parts that they'd assembled through luck, trade, and a smattering of thievery.

There was nothing that would usually draw her there, but now it hovered in her awareness, a spectre that was never far from her thoughts, and she found herself at the doors more than once, the General's words ringing in her ears: " _He'll respond better to you than anyone else._ " She would stare at the door for long minutes before retreating guiltily to her quarters.

On the fourth day, she found herself yet again staring down the storage bay doors. The worn and scarred metal had never looked so intimidating.

She took a step towards them, and the doors slid open with a metallic hiss.

At first glance, the room seemed empty. Some lights still worked, illuminating pockets of the room, while others remained shrouded in shadow. Crates were piled haphazardly around the room, creating a labyrnthine atmosphere.

"I wondered when you'd come," a deep voice came from the far corner of the room.

Rey nearly jumped out of her skin, "Don't  _do_ that! You scared me."

"I'm sorry."

"Why are you here?" she blurted.

"This is where my mother is keeping me," he replied simply.

"That's not what I meant and you know it," she snapped acidly.

"No," he agreed softly, "it's not."

Her temper flared, "Why don't you come out here and stop speaking to me from the shadows?"

There was a soft rustle of clothing against skin, and he emerged from the far side of the room, coming to stand in front of her.

He was just as large as she remembered, towering over her. His dark hair was longer, unkempt. He looked down at her through thick lashes; he stood so close to her that she could count them.

She stared resolutely up at him, "Why are you here, Ren?" she demanded.

"You called me Ben, before."

"That was when I thought you could be redeemed."

His lips twisted, "And now you know better."

"Yes," her tone was savage, "now I know better."

His gaze flicked downward. If she hadn't known better, she would have sworn that he was taking in her neck, her collarbones, her lips. She suppressed a shiver, "Why are you here?" she asked again.

Neither of them moved. They stood so close that they were nearly touching. She could feel the heat from his body radiating on to her skin.

"You were right," he said at last.

She blinked, nonplussed, "What?"

"You were right," he said again. "We can save the galaxy, you and I. We can work with the Resistance to overthrow the First Order and restore balance to the universe."

She stepped back, "I'm not ruling the galaxy with you."

He didn't move towards her, "I'm not asking you to rule it with me. I'm asking you to let me help you save it."


	2. Spies and Dissembling

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leia gives Rey some disturbing information.

"Let me get this straight," Leia said. "It's been five days, and you haven't gleaned any useful information from my son?"

"I told you, General," Rey answered, "when I asked him why he was here he just told me that he wanted to help me restore balance to the universe. It was...vague."

Leia quirked an eyebrow, "And how many times have you spoken to him?"

Rey fidgeted, "Once."

A muscle feathered in Leia's jaw, "And for how long?"

"I'm not sure, about 20 minutes?"

"You talked to him once, for less than half an hour, and you are surprised that you didn't get anything useful from him?"

"If he were here to help us," Rey pointed out, "then he could give any of us useful information at any time. He hasn't."

"You are the only person who has talked to him, other than the people who bring him food. Of course he hasn't given us useful information. No one else has asked!"

Rey was surprised by this, "You haven't gone to see him?"

Leia flushed, "As Poe so tactfully pointed out, my objectivity is not...completely clear in this case."

"You're telling me," Rey said, her temper rising, "that you, the General, haven't gone to question a high-profile prisoner because you're afraid of seeming biased? And you, his mother, are unwilling to go and see your own son? When was the last time you saw him before this?"

Leia didn't respond. Rey emitted a strangled huff, "Go talk to your son yourself, Leia. I'm not going to be your buffer."

As Rey turned to leave, the General said, "Wait, Rey. I will go and talk to him, soon. I'm not ready to face him yet, for so many reasons. But there is information that we need from him."

"Like what?" it was Rey's turn to quirk an eyebrow.

"We need to know how the First Order is tracking us so quickly."

"It's not because of the active tracking?"

Leia shook her head, "No, Holdo destroyed the ship that the active tracker was on. There's no way that they could have tracked us off Crait on the Falcon. But everywhere we've gone, Solmar, Tretia, Pelops...they've found us each time. If we can't figure out how they're finding us, we'll never be able to establish the roots that we need to find allies and to bolster our reserves."

Rey nodded slowly, "Do you have any idea? Any place where I should start?"

"Well," Leia answered, "you could start by finding out how he found us."

"There's something you're not telling me," Rey said. The lines of Leia's face, the way she held her body were like a secret that was desperate to hide itself away.

"Poe and I are worried that someone may be feeding information to the First Order."

The thought made Rey's blood run cold. There were so few of them left, the thought of any member of the Resistence betraying them was abhorrent, "That's not possible."

Leia sighed, "I don't like the idea either, Rey, but we have to consider every possibility. That's why I need you to talk to Ben, to find out why he's here, how he got here, and anything that he can tell you about the First Order: what their operations are, where their bases are, their numbers, and, most importantly, how they're getting their information."

Rey nodded, her thoughts scrambled by the knowledge that the General had just unloaded on her. "I'll talk to him, General. I'll find out everything that I can."

Leia nodded, "Thank you, Rey. I know I can count on you."

Rey turned to leave, but paused at the door, "You should talk to him, you know. I'm sure that he wants to see you."

The General did not respond, and Rey left the room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I promised quick updates and then bailed. So sorry! Life has been a little extra life-like lately, and the story has changed shape in my mind. I'll keep updating as I'm able, but please be patient with this small business owner/employee/student/mostly functioning adult who has to get her gods' damned taxes done.


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